i do feel like i can't keep up with today's world.
people now wear shawls etc
i'm still with tudung silang hahaha
no that's just the little unimportant stuff

i feel like i..can't keep up even if i want to
it's like if i try to keep up, it's gonna drain my strength.
all i wanna do is curl up into a ball.
do nobody.
i don't want to listen to anybody' updates
or care about anything.

i'm confused of who i should be.
i no longer find comfort or peace in whatever i loved to do.
i feel like things aren't the way they used to be,
i hate these changes that are happening around me.
it feels uncomfortable. it's not safe.

i read about something called dissociative fugue state.
it was interesting.
and i also read about different opinions on rulings on suicide due to psychological problems.
and that was interesting too.
well if you're aware that you're crazy, that means you're not.


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